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Today I achieved one of my goals for the year: my fiftieth manuscript rejection (that's novels only - not short stories or poems, which is a much larger number). I'm so proud.

This rejection took twelve months altogether (minus one day). It is the third time that particular manuscript (the first in my YA trilogy) has reached the final pre-publication hurdle only to be rejected. (First by Allen & Unwin, then by Harper Collins, and now by Penguin). Random House has already requested the full manuscript, and Pan Macmillan is the only major publisher in Australia who hasn't (they took nine months & involved the head of the fiction department before deciding not to request the full manuscript, and that was BEFORE I rewrote it in 2006). Most rejections aren't a big deal these days, although the cumulative effect is doing bad things to my mojo. This rejection stung a bit.

So far this book has cost around $800 (two manuscript assessments; one after the big rewrite) + $1000 (trip to NZ to meet Harper Collins, who wouldn't have looked at the first page otherwise) + $1750 (trip to NZ to go on 'Young Endeavour' as research specifically for this book) + $150 (postage costs and competition entries). Also my sanity, which so far has cost around $13,000 (but can't be blamed on JUST this book. . . ).

So that's $3700 in direct costs. My estimate of the profit I will make when it's published: $3000. So for roughly 1000 hours of work over four years, I have lost $700 and my sanity (that's assuming I get it published, which SEEMS likely). Per hour, that means this book has earned me -$.70, and .001 of a nervous breakdown.

Hmm.

When I get published, this whole saga is going to be the best story EVER. I wish I could just sleep through the months/years until then. But I guess that would be cheating.

Yes, the picture is this book (and only this book, though it's double spaced. It costs around $10 to post, and is 120,000 words long).